"Getting to Yes " is a book on negotiation authored by Roger Fisher, William Ury, and Bruce Patton, members of the Harvard Negotiation Project. The book outlines a strategy called "principled negotiation," which provides a constructive framework for reaching mutually beneficial agreements in disputes.

Key Points:

1. Separate the People from the Problem:

   • It's crucial to address issues without damaging relationships.
   • Understanding the emotions and perspectives of both sides helps in reaching a resolution.
   • Focus on attacking the problem, not the individuals involved.

2. Focus on Interests, Not Positions:

   • Positions are what people state they want, while interests are the underlying reasons for their positions.
   • By focusing on shared and conflicting interests, negotiators can uncover common ground or trade-offs.

3. Invent Options for Mutual Gain:

   • Brainstorming potential solutions encourages creative problem-solving.
   • The goal is to create win-win scenarios where both parties benefit.

4. Insist on Using Objective Criteria:

   • Negotiations should be based on fair standards, not arbitrary decisions.
   • Using objective criteria like market value, expert opinion, or legal precedent helps keep discussions rational and productive.

5. BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement):

   • Knowing your BATNA helps you understand your fallback options if negotiations fail.
   • The stronger your BATNA, the more leverage you have in negotiations.

Other Important Insights:

• Communication: Clear, honest communication fosters trust and helps prevent misunderstandings.
• Emotional Control: Staying calm and collected helps in dealing with aggressive or emotional counterparts.
• Negotiation Power: Power in negotiations comes from strong alternatives, clarity of interests, and the ability to persuade others.

People listen better if they feel that you have understood them.

They tend to think that those who understand them are intelligent and sympathetic people whose own opinions may be worth listening to.

So if you want the other side to appreciate your interests, begin by demonstrating that you appreciate theirs.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

Any method of negotiation may be fairly judged by three criteria:

It should produce a wise agreement if agreement is possible.

It should be efficient.

And it should improve or at least not damage the relationship between the parties.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The ability to see the situation as the other side sees it, as difficult as it may be, is one of the most important skills a negotiator can possess.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

If you want someone to listen and understand your reasoning, give your interests and reasoning first and your conclusions or proposals later.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The more extreme the opening positions and the smaller the concessions, the more time and effort it will take to discover whether or not agreement is possible.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

An open mind is not an empty one.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The best time for handling people problems is before they become people problems.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The more attention that is paid to positions, the less attention is devoted to meeting the underlying concerns of the parties.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The most powerful interests are basic human needs.

In searching for the basic interests behind a declared position, look particularly for those bedrock concerns that motivate all people.

If you can take care of such basic needs, you increase the chance both of reaching agreement and, if an agreement is reached, of the other side’s keeping to it.

Basic human needs include: security economic well-being a sense of belonging recognition control over one’s life.

As fundamental as they are, basic human needs are easy to overlook.

In many negotiations, we tend to think that the only interest involved is money.

Yet even in a negotiation over a monetary figure, such as the amount of alimony to be specified in a separation agreement, much more can be involved.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The challenge is not to eliminate conflict but to transform it.

It is to change the way we deal with our differences.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

Judgment hinders imagination.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The second negotiation concerns how you will negotiate the substantive question:

by soft positional bargaining, by hard positional bargaining, or by some other method.

This second negotiation is a game about a game—a “meta-game.”

Each move you make within a negotiation is not only a move that deals with rent, salary, or other substantive questions;

it also helps structure the rules of the game you are playing.

Your move may serve to keep the negotiations within an ongoing mode, or it may constitute a game-changing move.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

Pressure can take many forms: a bribe, a threat, a manipulative appeal to trust, or a simple refusal to budge.

In all these cases, the principled response is the same:

invite them to state their reasoning, suggest objective criteria you think apply, and refuse to budge except on this basis.

Never yield to pressure, only to principle.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

Understanding is not agreeing.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

The ongoing relationship is far more important than the outcome of any particular negotiation.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

Whether a negotiation concerns a contract, a family quarrel, or a peace settlement among nations, people routinely engage in positional bargaining.

Each side takes a position, argues for it, and makes concessions to reach a compromise.

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes

THE METHOD

1. Separate the People from the Problem

2. Focus on Interests, Not Positions

3. Invent Options for Mutual Gain

4. Insist on Using Objective Criteria

Roger Fisher - Getting to Yes